On D’arcy
Every so often some dude will take to Reddit (I should just end there), and make a post on the Resident Alien sub about how much they hate D’arcy. Before you trouble yourself with reading this latest installment, know that I appreciate these posts. They often talk about D’arcy in terms used to describe any male antihero. Witness this choice quotashe: “Trust me, I totally understand her character, so far. No amount of trauma gives anyone the right to be that dangerous, that psychotic, that manipulative, that selfish and self-centered.” I’m sorry, are you talking about D’arcy bloom or WALTER WHITE? Are you talking about THE JOKER??? Also, hilariously, they used this absolutely stunning screencap of a scene I had completely forgotten about:
This clip is from when I go to a town hall and do this extremely Arthur-Fonzarelli-coded move of telling this guy to give up his seat with my face. It’s funny because I am tiny and he is an old man just minding his business. It’s funny because it’s randomly aggressive, in a low-stakes way. The OP called D’arcy a “bully.” Sure. Okay. Whatever, loser. Get bent. You know who else was a bully on screen? That character from Step Brothers that made Ben Stiller absolutely convinced he needed to make a vehicle for Adam Scott worthy of his mighty genius talent. I can think of one on-screen example (having just decided to write about this four minutes ago, tbf) of a female bully-antihero that doesn’t get as much hate as D’arcy: Regina George of Mean Girls. What is the difference? Well, Rachel McAddams played Regina George and is a way better actor than me, younger and hotter (I do not care, do not write that I am hot in the comments, I beg you). Also, D’arcy is an adult, sort of. But I think more telling is that D’arcy almost never “bullies” the women characters of patience. It’s always guys. Chris wrote her that way, and it’s weird that no one ever picks up on this when they are whining about how mean she is. Regina George almost exclusively bullies women. She exists to hold other women down so that she can be the one who gets picked by the shockingly mid main dude.
If you are triggered (snowflake) by the above-pictured scene, then I hope that means you have been randomly bullied by a woman. I like to imagine her out there, throwing her popcorn on you at the movies because your breathing too loud. But mainly, I read these posts with satisfaction of a job well done. However flawed my performance, I am hitting an extremely insecure man’s last nerve, and knowing this, I sleep like a baby.
Now, on to where I sleep tonight. I am currently back in California en route to LA, stopping for two nights at Garret’s father’s house which some of you will remember as the House of Froid and Chaud. The titular Father is out with his wife (????) at, drumroll please, COMEDY NIGHT. No idea what that means. None. Reader, it’s so weird when relatives or close friends of mine go to see comedy that isn’t me. I get jealous and resentful even though I hate when relatives come to see me perform. It’s my nightmare! When I do stand up, I am in the workiest work mode. I am clocked the fuck in. Stand-up is a realm you have to really break into by force, and once you’re in there’s a whole code of conduct and lingo and general focus that anyone who does not do stand up will miss, and my co-dependence makes me note their presence as an alarming disturbance on my peripheral. I feel encumbered and I have had some of my worst sets when family is present. Including my cast family from Resident Alien! I have to actually sneak around to do shows there when I am filming because they get mad at me when I don’t tell them. AND YET! I found out about G’s dad going to some random comedy night and I was like “Quick question: what the fuck?” I have not the energy to investigate my lizard brain telling me this non-problem is a problem, because it’s getting late and I have to finish this newsletter before they get back and inevitably want to talk about the show. At which time I will be completely annoyed and fascinated. Also I have been in the side office off the guest suite (read original Nosferatu review for context) and I can feel Garret about to come in and tell me to use a coaster.
In other news: WE DID IT! We managed to fuck up Elon’s week with the Wisconsin supreme court. Early numbers showing it was…yes! It was the Alice Wetterlund patreon subscribers that tipped the balance. Everyone, a milkshake or dairy treat of your choice, if you partake. That was the beginning of some relatively not-the-worst political news among the other stuff which was of course the worst. Turns out there are people who regret their vote for Trump, yay, but only because they are slightly less rich, nay. Score one point for…humanity’s base instincts eating their own tail in an ouroboros of greed. But also! Corey Booker gave a speech which, however you feel about him, erased the record of the longest speech in congress from a racist who just read the encyclopedia! That is good. It just is. And I think he should have said more about the horrors in Palestine, but I’m wary of diminishing an inspiring moment from the non-greedsnake side. We need the momentum. I think it’s ok to have the conversation and keep Gaza in the forefront, and it’s also a good thing for Corey Booker to talk about defunding Alzheimer’s research and medicate and civil rights being eroded and 800 other things because unfortunately, you can easily fill 25 hours with all the shit the Trump Movement has done without even really getting to foreign policy. It is really fucking scary here. I can say ‘here,’ now, because I am back stateside. On our ten hour drive through the Oregon and northern California countryside, we didn’t get to see any of the Hands Off marches in person. We did see a pathetic, fourteen-person pro-Trump demonstration on a bridge over the highway. We saw more actual sheep than sheeple Trump supporters which actually is new. Usually there’s a MAGA sign of some kind every 20 mins or so. They were much more sparse this time. Meanwhile, the marches finally got big enough for the mainstream news to cover it and for many right wing tweet people to say it was all paid actors. Look, if there are that many paid actors and I am not getting auditions for the March, I need a new agent. Can series regulars really not audition for the March??? This is good. Them making excuses is them freaking out because they know they can’t just not address it. We should do more of this, because it works, but mostly because I missed this one and we all know I get FOMO poisoning. But for real, Wetterheads, please be safe, please hold on to whatever gives you hope and makes you laugh right now. Comment any good signs you saw at marches even if you didn’t go. I’ll go first:
I hope she is a bully.